Are all Advances in Design Good?
Have we let designers go too far?
Late one recent wet and stormy evening, I received a call telling me that a friend’s motor car had broken down.
As I have some limited mechanical chops, (a mostly undeserved reputation, I assure you), I volunteered to try to rescue the situation. I drove to the north of our town, where the stranded car was flashing its hazard warning just short of some traffic lights.
Fortunately, the road was wide enough so that traffic approaching from behind could just about squeeze by. But the car was causing an obstruction and needed to be removed quickly. The driver had already telephoned her Rescue Service and the Police. The former said they could attend in about 2 ½ hours (‘We’re busy tonight, Madame’); the latter said they would not attend, as the road was not completely blocked.
It was raining, dark and cold. The three women from the car had warm coats and hats, but were obviously chilled, seeking shelter from a hedge, away from the road itself. I asked what were the symptoms before the car broke down.
The model was equipped with Stop/Start technology. This is a design feature which turns off the engine when the car comes to a stop. It is intended to reduce emissions of noxious gases while cars idle in heavy traffic. Sounds like a good idea, no? I wonder about the longevity of the starter motors which might operate a hundred times during a traffic-laden journey instead of once, but that’s another argument.
The driver had slowed and pulled up behind a queue of others when the traffic lights went red. She kept her foot on the brake, as required by the technology, (annoying the driver behind), but the car didn’t restart when she transferred her foot to the accelerator pedal. She tried starting it manually, with the ignition button. It didn’t even turn over. I didn’t need to be an Automotive Whisperer to diagnose an electrical fault in this 18 month-old motor car.
“No problem”, I said. “We can’t try to bump-start it, as it’s an automatic transmission. Let’s just push it up on the pavement, out of the way of the traffic.”
It quickly became clear that the electrical fault had locked the transmission in ‘Park’. Moreover, the hand brake, which was, for so many decades, a lever connected to the rear brakes or prop shaft, is now electronically-operated. And if there is any fault in the electrical circuitry, guess what happens - it remains in the locked position – for safety!
Thus, the vehicle was, indeed, absolutely stranded and would require a rescue truck with crane and dolly wheels to shift it.
I used to moan that ‘modern car engines are so shrouded in plastic shielding and mysterious pipework that the enthusiastic amateur can no longer service or fix them’. But it’s gone way beyond that now. We have entered the era of self-correcting, auto-dipping headlights, self-steering, auto-braking, self-parking vehicles which beep and bong at us to remember to drive between the white lines or further from that hedge. My level of admiration for the inventive engineers who achieve these wonderous design feats knows no bounds.
But I suggest we may have let them go too far.
Have you seen the stories of motorists who tell of their car swerving onto the opposite side of the road or into a hedge without driver input? For years, Audi suffered a growing reputation, especially in the US, for selling cars which accelerated by themselves without warning. Citroen’s lane guidance system was written up by a number of motoring journalists on the Continent for comparable unintended changes of direction.
I believe we are bringing up a generation of young drivers who will not be able to cope with even slightly adverse road conditions. Do you know which manufacturers still offer manual transmissions? It ain’t many. The joy of mastering skills like double-de-clutching, heel-and-toeing and left-foot braking will be denied to everyone. The rite of passage of the young driver to have his or her first car – worn out, unreliable, but – it’s theirs – will be removed. Tales of cramming the car with mates, luggage and musical instruments and breaking down on the side of the motorway on a rainy Friday night, but fixing it with pliers and a piece of wire, will be things of the past.
I suggest that some of these ‘safety’ devices increase risk by making the car do unexpected things at the wrong time. Back in the 1980s, I remember being told of youngsters in Saudi Arabia clicking on the Cruise Control and turning around to chat with their friends – they thought this was an ‘auto-drive’ control. Ha, ha, I thought. That could never happen here. Well, it is, in modified form.
Why don’t these young and bright design engineers come up with inexpensive ways to defeat the growing onslaught of squirrels in my garden? Last year’s kits are venturing forth now, wreaking havoc and looking for lurve. It’s clear they are inexperienced, because they show no fear of humans or even my dog until he is very, very close. Are they playing a game of Sciurian Chicken? Some years ago, I built a garden retaining wall with wire gabion cages. These fasten together with stout wire. I have used some left-over pieces to secure the latest bird feeder to a tree. The wire shows teeth marks already, where the little blighters have again attempted theft of the whole thing. I never found last year’s feeder – the climber’s ‘D’ ring wasn’t strong enough to resist.
I’m going to set out some blobs of peanut butter with chopped chili peppers inside. Chilli passes through bird digestive systems without harming them. But squirrels are said to hate chilli.
I’ll let you know if they work. But think very carefully before you sell your manual transmission motor car. Roadside assistance isn’t always available. And I’m going to look for my air rifle.
